How to Treat a Live-In Nanny
The relationship between nanny and employer is a difficult balance of professionalism and friendship. Because your nanny is a live-in, it can become easy to slip into only seeing her/him as an extension of your family, but nannies are professionals and need to be treated that way. Your family needs to find a way to make the nanny feel included without making her feel like she is constantly trapped on the job.
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Instructions
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Know what nannies cost and what to expect. Make sure you are paying the nanny enough money for the job that is required. She will find out soon enough if she is being underpaid for the position.
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Provide adequate living space. Live-in nannies usually receive full room and board and a weekly salary. If possible, the nanny should be given his/her own room that is preferably away from everyone else. You don't want the nanny to feel as if she is continually on the job.
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Provide transportation, especially if your nanny came from out of the state or country. If you can't, make sure your nanny has her own. Without a car she may feel trapped, which is just asking for tension to rise.
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Include her in family activities, but always ask first. It is natural to want to make the nanny an integral part of the family, but she may need a break from everyone after a long day or week at work. Be sure to ask her away from the children so they do not make her feel guilty for not doing something with the family if she declines.
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Encourage the nanny to go out and make new friends. This will give her a support system so that she does not feel lonely and isolated. Your nanny needs a social life to be healthy.
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Give the nanny a schedule in advance, and stick to it. Changing the schedule constantly or coming home late is not acceptable and is going to irritate your nanny. Remember that this is a job -- just imagine if your boss was always changing the schedule on you or showing up late for appointments.
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Be up front about responsibilities. Make sure the nanny knows what she is required to do around the house. Most nannies are only required to clean up after the children, so if you have the nanny doing extra housework, pay her extra.
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Talk to the nanny. If something seems to be bothering your nanny be open to discussion and critique. The nanny is going to have a different outlook on life and may have been offended or may feel that you are asking more of her than you originally stated. This is a two-way street, so if something is bothering you, tell her. The nanny is not a mind reader and cannot fix a problem if not asked to do so.
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Remember that your nanny is an adult and should be treated that way.
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Tips & Warnings
Do not make the nanny feel obligated to attend family outings if you do not really need her to watch the children.
Always remember that this is a job for the nanny, not her life.
You are not the nanny's parents away from home, so do not attempt to act as if you are.
References
- Photo Credit SW Productions/Brand X Pictures/Getty Images
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Comments
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Common Sense
Mar 21, 2008
Isn't that what your wife is for? -
joonbug246
Dec 02, 2007
Ha this is great. Every family hiring a nanny should think about this stuff. I am going to print this out and leave it for Mrs. G. She will probably skim right over the part that says your nanny is an adult.
