How to Use the Internet to Find a Husband

Okay, so I am guilty of being madly in love with my computer and its accomplice the Internet. But for those of you who are still looking, HERE IT IS--a manual, handbook, guide or whatever you want to call it that will help you to find your mate using science and the Internet.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Computer with broadband Internet access
• Telephone
• Digital camera
• Transportation
• A great singles ad

1. Do this right Get scientific. Compile a list of qualities and/or attributes you would like to see in your mate. Spend time on this list. This is your "husband order."
2. Good head shot Play with your camera and practice taking pix of yourself. You will need lots of different ones.
3. This is science Think up a really good username and password and use the same one for all dating sites. It is just easier.
4. This is a process Register with all the TOTALLY FREE online singles sites first. After that, just use the ones that you like best. It may take a while to find just the right sites, then the replies will start to roll in. Process those replies.
5. He looks nice Meet the good ones. Then repeat the process as many times as necessary to find your MAN.

Tips & Warnings

• Treat this like the science that it is. Have a list of questions that you interview everyone with. If someone has a problem with that, then they were up to no good anyway.
• Never go alone to meet someone.