How to Introduce a New Girlfriend to the Kids
Introducing a new girlfriend to your kids after you've been divorced is a delicate matter, and it requires honesty, timing and sensitivity on your part. By constantly communicating with your kids about your feelings and emotions after your divorce, you will find it easy when it comes time to introduce the new woman in your life.
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Instructions
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Plan out the proper timing for your kids to meet your new girlfriend. If you introduce them to your new girlfriend too early in the relationship, they may grow attached and be hurt if things don't work out. At the same time, they may also feel alienated and rejected if the relationship has already become serious by the time that they find out about it for the first time.
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Base the timing of the introduction on the ages of your kids. Younger children may be confused when they meet your new girlfriend for the first time, thinking that you are trying to find a replacement for their mother. Older children, especially teenagers, will understand your need for romance and companionship, and may accept your new girlfriend more readily.
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Have a conversation with your kids about your new girlfriend before the introduction. You will be able to determine if they are emotionally ready to meet the new person in your life, and it will enable you to intercept any difficulties that may arise if they aren't quite ready yet. At the same time, you may want to have the same conversation with your new girlfriend to determine if she feels prepared as well.
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Explain to your children about the role your new girlfriend will have in your life, and how your routines may change as a result. At the same time, you may want to go over your expectations with your new girlfriend as well, and set up certain boundaries so that she will not seem too motherly toward your kids.
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Introduce your kids to your new girlfriend in a neutral, relaxed atmosphere. Let the conversation flow naturally, and encourage questions from both sides. Calmly end the meeting if you sense too much tension, or if anyone seems too uncomfortable.
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Tips & Warnings
If the mother of your children is deceased, then you may want to take special precautions to assure that your new girlfriend is an addition to your life, and not intended as a replacement for their mother in any way.
