How to Survive Deployment

As a soldier wife I had to go through many deployments. They say it get easier with every time but is not true. There are some tricks that I want to share and will help to make deployments as painless as possible.

Instructions

Difficulty: Challenging

1. Be positive at all the time. Like everything else if you start with thinking the worse you will work yourself out and down. I had to spend many days helping wives in the Psychiatric ward after they attempted suicide because they were lonely and thinking life was not worth without their partners.
2. Keep busy. If you work, focus on your job. If you don’t work, look for a volunteer job. Try to be out of the house and interacting with other people as much as you can. This will keep your mind on the life you have instead of keeping it on the life you wish it was.
3. Don’t run home. Keep living your life, especially if you have children. Let them know they are important too. Remember they are already stressing because one of their parent is gone. Let them know you are here for them. By leaving you take them off their environment. You take them away from their friend. Moving is already hard when you have the family together. Don’t make it harder on them than it already is.
4. Focus on short deadlines. Don’t start to mark the days on the calendar. Don’t think how long it will be till he comes home. Instead think of what is the next celebration coming up. Is it your child's birthday? Is it Easter? Is it Thanksgiving? Is it Christmas? Whatever the celebration that is coming up next, focus on it only, it will come up faster and it will keep you busy preparing for it. And yes, it is okay to focus on your significant other's birthday or on your anniversary. But remember to think of what you can do to surprise him or her instead of thinking that you a missing them.
5. Avoid the news. Try not to watch national news channels at all. They just keep you worried and make you upset. Plus they keep you in suspense every time you hear somebody got hurt.
6. Keep in touch with family. If you can afford go visit for the holidays or even better invite them for the holidays.
7. Keep your identity. Live your life. Don’t put everything on hold for him or her. It will make it unbearable and lead to psychological problems. Take some special time for yourself. Remember that if you are okay everybody will be okay, including your spouse who is away and can’t focus on our nation if they are worry about you.
8. Go to the family support meetings. Talking to other military family member in your same situation will make you realize that you are not alone in what you feel and it will help you cope better. Plus, if somebody has hard time coping, and your friendship helps them, it will make you proud.

Tips & Warnings

• It is okay to cry once in a while. It does not mean you are weak. It only means you are human.
• Try to go to sleep very tired. This way you will fall asleep right away and won't have any time to think.