How to Flex Your Happiness Muscle

Put a smile on your face and make the world a better place.

Happy people attract happy people attract happy people attract happy people. It's like a chain of dominos, only instead of knocking you to the ground, happiness lifts you, and everyone around you, to peaks of greatness. The good news is, contrary to prevailing perspectives, happiness need not be a helpless emotion that arrives only when external circumstances are just right. Happiness is less like the weather outside your door and more like the muscle inside your arm. With a little practice and regular training, you too can be a model for happiness fitness.

Things You'll Need

• A willingness to act as artist, creator, CEO, manager and employee of your life's happiness

Instructions

How to Flex Your Happiness Muscle

1. Acknowledge your strength. I often hear people talk as though they are at the mercy of their emotions. This is backwards. Your emotions are at the mercy of you. When it comes to creating a life of abundance, you are the Incredible Hulk. You are She-Ra. You are Superwoman. You are Batman. Left alone, emotions are weak. It is how you feed and interpret your emotions that gives them their power. You have the strength to evoke happiness at a moment's notice.

2. Start the day with a happiness exercise. My mother and I sip tea and discuss current events. My friend Eric goes for a run as the sun rises. My friend Whitney writes a gratitude list before even getting out of bed. Create a ritual for yourself to warm up your happiness muscle and ensure that it is ready to work throughout the day.

3. Surround yourself with beauty. Learn the power of Feng Shui. Decorate with colors and textures that soothe your eyes and your soul. Arrange a vase of flowers. Listen to fantastic music. Be deliberate in the clothing you wear. While you need not be at the mercy of your external world, you can use material elements to help guide you down happiness road.

4. Smile. Which came first, the smile or the happiness? It's a quandary worth pondering.

5. Say no to things that drag you down. Let's face facts: we are limited in the amount of time we have on this planet. If we devote too much of our precious moments to that which causes us stress, anxiety or exhaustion we greatly limit our chances for moments of bliss. Saying no is difficult and may mean you'll need to do some serious self-examination and reorienting of your priorities. The work is worth it, however, if more happiness is the end payoff.

6. Say yes to everything that gives you energy, that makes you smile, that softens your edges, that opens your heart, that fills you with gratitude, that affirms your vision of the ideal existence. Try not to question the practicality of it all. Happiness is not always practical, but it is always enlivening.

7. Exercise your actual muscles. Studies show again and again that exercise is a great way to wash away blues. You're certain to feel happier after a walk, a dance class or an hour at the boxing gym.

8. Discuss what's right. Rehashing all that's missing from your life can be an addictive cycle that is certain to keep happiness at bay. While it's important to talk about sadness and hard times with loved ones, if you find yourself sounding like a broken record, replaying the same problems over and over, it's time to examine your speech patterns and move them toward the positive.

9. Wear your blinders. The world is full of negativity and fear. Ignore the bad news and instead search out stories and events that confirm the fact that joy, kindness, compassion, understanding, awareness and spiritual progress are alive and well across the globe.

10. Let sadness arise. The secret to happiness does not lie in repressing uncomfortable feelings. Happy people are not happy 100% of the time. Nor do they put on a fake happy face when times are tough. The secret to happiness lies in knowing that sometimes you feel down, but that those down feelings do not mean the end of you. The truth is, sadness and happiness need not be mutually exclusive. So don't freak out when you feel down. Remember, just has happiness ebbs and flows, so goes sadness. The two can coexist.

11. Move your energy when you get stuck in a rut. If you are down and can't seem to find happiness, it's time to do something new. Call a friend. Sign up for an art class. Start a job search. Get a haircut. Change things up physically and your emotions are sure to follow suit.

Resources

• Live an Extraordinary Life