How to Politely Let Someone At Work Know They Are Disturbing You

So often in the workplace, there is someone who disturbs you by talking too much, asks you too many questions, laughs too loud or just plain annoys and constantly interrupts you. You may be dealing with a person that whenever they get off a phone call, they just have to tell you all about their conversation, word for word. What can you do when you have work to get done and need to focus and really wished this person would just stop bothering you. Try these steps to get back to work.

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

1. Next time you are disturbed, take the person somewhere where you can be alone for a moment. Be serious, but don't appear to be angry or upset, even if you are. By taking them somewhere private, you are setting the stage and gaining their undivided attention.

2. Explain to them that you do enjoy working with them and point out some positive points about them. There is always something positive you can say, even if you have to dig a little deep to find it.

3. Explain to this person that you have a little problem in that you are the type of person who is easily interrupted and can loose focus pretty quickly when your train of thought is broken. Say something like this, "I'm sure you are not aware of it, but you interrupt me and I lose focus on what I am doing or thinking about and often have to start all over again to get back to where I was. I know you don't mean to do this and I just have one little request of you..."

4. Describe your request. You might say something like, "Next time you want to tell me about something or ask me a question, all I ask is that you look at what I am doing first. If I don't appear to be involved with something, simply call out my name and ask me if it is a good time to talk about something, or to listen to what you have to say. Then wait for my response back to you rather than continuing to talk. If it isn't a good time, I will say something quick like, 'Not right now,' or 'Let's talk at our next break. ' How does that sound to you?"

5. Now wait for their response. Chances are, they will be surprised that they were disturbing you, and may even apologize to you. Let them know that you are sincerely thankful for their understanding your particular personality and do appreciate their help. The person should leave the meeting with a feeling of slight shame, but also that they will be helping you out by complying with your simple request.

Tips & Warnings

• Come to them in a respectful and pleasant manner.
• Project the feeling that they will really be doing you a favor by complying.
• Don't act indifferent to them after your private conversation. You don't want this person to feel alienated or that they shouldn't speak to you at all.
• Blame yourself to some degree if you are comfortable with it, for losing your focus rather easily.

[can-do]

on 9/21/2009 Hi nikklesanddimes, It sounds like you are in a pretty tough spot at work, and yes, it does spread and get worse unless "management" does something about it. Usually these situations continue because of weak and inmature management. You need to protect yourself from the negativity as best as possible if you plan on staying there. I have an article called "How To Avoid Absorbing Other People's Negativity" which you should find here on line under my name. It is one of my featured articles. Just "maybe" it will help you out personally since you can't seem to change your work place. It has certainly helped me many a time when dealing with people that were disruptive, negative and in general annoying. Good Luck, Can-do

[nikklesanddimes]

on 9/21/2009 I wish I could approach this person, but unfortunately management even requests silence with no success. The maturity level is not there. Lack of respect and disregard for others is this persons game. Its spread to other co-workers.....Now we have a few even older woman who find it hilarious to be disruptive and annoying. This is very stressful to deal with and find it hard to maintain my attendance. I find that they do it on purpose to annoy others as though its a way to bully others. Management does not go any further and plays favorites and does nothing as far as consequences.......