How to Stop Bullying in Schools

There is a school of thought that holds that bullying is a normal part of growing up, but more and more schools, parents and kids themselves are realizing that bullying is abuse and is unacceptable.

Instructions

1. Maintain open communication with your children. Talk to them every day about details small and large. How did their classes go? What do they have for homework that night? Who'd they sit with at lunch? Who'd they play with at recess? Listen carefully and be responsive to show interest. Your kids will know if you're distracted or just going through the motions, so pay attention.

2. Take complaints seriously, whether they be stories of physical bullying or verbal or psychological bullying. If your child is telling you about problems she has at school, you can bet that there is plenty that she hasn't told you about. By the time a child reveals her pain to you, the bullying has almost always been going on for a prolonged period.

3. Intervene. Kids are almost always reluctant to have a parent intervene, because they fear the social stigma of having their parents fight their battles. However, it is up to you to intervene on your child's behalf with school administrators to ensure your child's physical and emotional well-being.

4. Visit the Stop Bullying Now website (see Resources below). The website, which is run by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Health Resources and Services Administration, includes interactive tools, publications, printouts and advice for parents, kids and educators on the best ways to stop bullying in schools.

5. Attend a Kidpower Teenpower Fullpower International workshop. The organization offers programs throughout the U.S., Canada, Europe, New Zealand and parts of Asia to teach children how to "stay safe and act wisely with strangers, bullies and people they know." The programs focus on giving kids hands-on opportunities to learn and practice skills for safely and effectively handling psychological and physical bullying.

Tips & Warnings

• While bullying in elementary schools is no less damaging to the children being bullied, dealing with bullying by younger kids is usually easier and more straightforward. Younger kids are generally less sophisticated about how they bully, and most young kids still have a healthy respect for consequences and authority figures such as school administrators.

• Some kids in middle school or junior high would actually rather endure the bullying than have a parent intervene on their behalf just to avoid the social stigma of having mom or dad fight their battles. Leaving your child on his own to deal with bullying could result in a decline in academic performance, depression and, in extreme cases, suicide. You are the parent. Support your child lovingly, but do take the bully by the horns.

• Don't talk to the parents of the bullies. Parents become defensive when their child is accused of bullying, and the conversation will generally not be a productive one. Let the school administrators manage the communication with the parents.

Resources

• Stop Bullying Now
• Kidpower Teenpower Fullpower International