How to Explain a Bitter Divorce to a Date

If you're going through a nasty divorce and you've starting dating again, you may feel like you're in purgatory. Your divorce proceedings can drain you physically, emotionally and financially. However, you don't want to squander the possibility of the budding relationship before you. Proceed carefully as you explain your situation to your date.

Instructions

1. Let your date bring up the subject first. If your divorce just happened, you may be chomping at the bit for a chance to unload your frustrations. Your unwitting companion may be just looking for a relaxing dinner and conversation. Save the conversation for later if your date doesn't ask about the divorce.

2. Keep an even temperament. As you begin to rehash your difficulties, emotions can get the better of you, revealing an unbecoming side of your temper best left concealed. If you feel your facial twitch activating, change the subject.

3. Be honest because you don't know where this date could lead. If you spin tales to cast your ex in a negative light, the truth might emerge later to destroy your current relationship.

4. Use "I" language when discussing the divorce. This signals ownership of your emotions, rather than a tendency to play the blame game. Instead of, "He's so greedy," say, "I don't agree with the terms of the settlement."

5. Play your cards close to your chest. Although you must be honest, you don't need to give an exhaustive history of your marriage to prove how nasty your ex is.

6. Focus on the future, not the past. Your date may seem empathetic, but probably would rather move forward. Give her assurance that you've reached closure.

7. Share something you learned from the relationship. If you can show your date that you've learned some life lessons from the breakup, you show signs of maturity and growth.