How to Make a Rules for Our House list to ease blended family

When I remarried when my boys were five and three, we had a little trouble with discipline, especially when I wasn't there to dole it out. So, we sat down and made a RULES FOR OUR HOUSE list that we posted on the front door, bathroom, and in the boys's bedroom so it could be seen daily and referred to if needed. Worked like a charm! Little kids in early elementary school love to make lists and check things off. Good Luck with your blended family!

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Paper and Markers
• tape
• table for family meeting
• all members of family living in your home.

1. Gather your paper and markers. We ended up printing ours up on the computer, but just a list with different colors will do.
2. Decide in your mind which issues within your home you need to address. Make sure your partner is in on this as well. You will need as much adult input as you can get!
3. Call a Family Meeting around a table. TV, radio and games off. Make this as official as you possibly can. Turn off all lights in house except where meeting is being held.
4. Call meeting to order. Begin by telling everyone how much you love them, and how you want your house to be a happy house, and happy houses love rules, and rules need to be followed.
5. Go around the table, and have each member make a rule that is important to them. We once got a 'Don't forget to feed the snails' rule. It was important to him at that time.
   Add each rule to the list for your home.
   Be sure to stress that some of The Rules or Da Rules! if you are Nick TV fans, should be followed everywhere, school, Grandma's, visiting, whatever applies to your family, and some rules are for your home alone. No one but us had snails to feed.- and others, being respectful of other people's feelings, belongings, etc. are for everywhere.
   A couple of important issues in our home a the time were: Listen To The Grown Up In Charge, and Bedtime is BEDTIME!
   Make sure everyone has at least one rule on the list, and slip your important issues in between. Discuss each rule, giving explanations and instructions as needed.
   Make sure everyone is on the same page. (hence the list).
   Discuss consequences for not following the rules. We had Time Outs.
   Write the really important ones in red or another bold color.
6. When you are satisfied that all the bases have been covered, make copies of The Rules For This House. Try to make them all the same. If you have older children, have them each make a copy. Then, as a family, go around your house and post the rules in conspicuous locations.
   If Mom or Dad break a rule, take a time out as well. This teaches that some people are not more equal than others.

Tips & Warnings

• We had a 'no alcohol' rule in our first list of rules because that was an important issue at 'Daddy' s house'.
• Make sure your family knows that sometimes everyone makes mistakes, and that this list will help everyone remember some of the mistakes being made.
• IF and adult breaks a rule, be sure to take your consequences.
• Sometimes we need a Time Out, too!