How to tell if a film critic doesn't have your best interests at heart

Film critics are supposed to tip readers off about good or neglected films while scaring us away from movies that aren't worth our time. So why don't readers trust critics as much as they should? It's likely because not all critics are solid film advocates. Some let biases and other preferences slip into their reportage which breaks the trust between writer and reader.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

1. Get to the point: Some critics know a lot about film, and God bless
   'em if that's the case. But they don't have to show their knowledge
   off in every review. If a critic blathers on about a 1940s era musical
   for six paragraphs before getting to his review of a new musical, be
   suspicious.

2. A little mystery, please? A good film review will tell readers the
   basic thrust of the story. A bad film review breaks down the entire
   story, leaving little for the audience to learn when the theater goes
   dark. Movie reviews offer enough space to break down the good, the bad
   and the awful. If a critic doesn't see fit to use that space wisely,
   that's a blow to his credibility.

3. Rosebud. Any critic who hints at the film's ending or otherwise
   gives away key plot points has issues that go beyond journalism. If
   you spot one of these critics, read future articles by him at your
   peril. He'll do it again, and gladly so.

4. Beware the bias. Critics are people, too. So a critic could be
   liberal, pro-choice, pro-gun control, etc. and it may show in their
   reviews. Watch for it, and be wary if a critic praises a film that
   mirrors his beliefs to the letter. A reputable critic will put his
   feelings aside and judge a film solely on its merits.

5. Mr. Smug. Some film critics have been at it too long. They've grown
   to recognize, and despise, the formulaic nature of Hollywood products,
   and it shows in their reviews. So if said critic is always trashing
   films, or if she can't go an entire review without referencing some
   obscure, superior art house feature, look elsewhere for your
   information.