Things You'll Need:
- Strong desire to heal
- Patience
- Courage
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Step 1
Notice the areas in your life in which you do trust. Most people trust that a boss will deliver a paycheck periodically or that the lights will come on if they pay the electric bill.
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Step 2
Realize that you trust some people in your life to meet some of your needs. Adult survivors of childhood abuse often fall into the "all or nothing" trap and assume that another person is not trustworthy if he has let the survivor down in any area. It is okay to trust a friend to show up on time while not trusting that same friend to keep a secret.
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Step 3
Recognize which of your needs are already being met. If you have one friend you trust to show up on time and another who you trust to keep a secret, then you already trust some people to meet some of your needs.
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Step 4
Build trust in yourself. Frequently, trust issues for an adult survivor of childhood abuse center around the abuse survivor's fear of falling apart if trust is betrayed. The more you trust in your own ability to be okay after betrayal or disappointment, the less scary it will feel to risk trusting another person.
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Step 5
Choose someone to trust. Ask yourself which person in your life is the best risk for revealing your true self. Then, reveal parts of yourself in stages. Only reveal as much as you feel comfortable at any given time.
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Step 6
Push through insecurities. The drive to keep secrets can be very strong in an adult survivor of childhood abuse. You might know intellectually that another person is trustworthy but fear revealing your true self at the same time. When you are ready, take a calculated risk and push through your insecurities.
