How to Attend a Parent-Teacher Conference

Parent-teacher conferences can either be a wonderful insight into your child's progress in school or a complete waste of time. These conferences are not called for the parent to talk about the child; the intention is for the teacher to discuss the student. An effective conference has the teacher talking for 80 to 90 percent of the time. This is the most effective way to learn about your child.



I have held over 200 parent-teacher conferences since 1996, and the most effective conferences were the ones where the parents listened more than they spoke. Here are some ways to get the most out of your meeting.

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

1. 

   Be on time for the conference. Teachers usually stack the conferences one right after another, and if you are five minutes late you are either inconveniencing everyone behind you or cutting your conference short by 5 minutes.

2. Allow the teacher to start the conference. Don't bombard the teacher with questions right away.

3. Do not argue or refute what the teacher is telling you. Do not make excuses for your child.

4. Ask the teacher about areas of improvement for your child. The teacher may report that your child is doing well in all areas, but be sure to walk away from the conference with something for your child to work on.

5. Don't tell the teacher how they should handle certain situations. If you feel the need to give the teacher advice, be sure to take into account the other 19 to 30 children in the class first. Do not ask the teacher to do something that will take away significant attention from the other students.

Tips & Warnings

• If you are able to choose your time, try for something early. Teachers are human and might not be at their best towards the very end of the day. I am usually at my best right after lunch or first thing in the morning.
• If you are divorced from your spouse, do not ask for separate conferences. You should both hear the exact same information about your child. It is also not considerate of the teacher's time to ask for two conferences for one child.

[martinkang]

on 12/21/2008 www.seemile.com will be helpful to person who whants to be Parent-Teacher.

[shaneinindy]

on 11/21/2008 all parents should go to the kids if they are mettings evan if they are divorced

[Teachforever]

on 11/19/2008 As a teacher, I only wish parents would take more time to attend them. This is awesome time for Parent/Teacher to communicate how to assist or enhance their child's educational experience.

[andrea3967]

on 11/18/2008 First of all, I agree with the divorced parents having a joint conference with the teacher. Regardless of how difficult the divorce is/was, the children need to see that the parents can still come together in order to benefit the child. The two adults divorced each other, they didn't stop being parents.

Secondly, I disagree with not telling the teacher how to handle certain situations. Yes they have several kids in their class but it doesn't mean that they should not focus on the individuality of the child.

Yes, your time is important, but so is my child. I want to hear about how she/he is doing, but you also need to hear the feedback I get at home about homework and assignments. Successful parent-teacher conferences should be an even exhange, not 80-90% of the teacher talking.

[cboulianne]

on 11/18/2008 Interesting. At our school the KIDS talk 80% of the time, explaining examples of their work that they've selected for inclusion in a portfolio. They demonstrate knowledge by explaining to their parent(s) how they solved problems, brainstormed a short story, etc. Then teacher and parents spend about ten minutes talking about the child's progress after the child has left the room. Often teachers solicit parent's advice on how best to teach the child in areas needing improvement. For example, is Maya really struggling in math or duming down to fit in with peers? Is Aydin going through a tough time with a recent divorce.

The information on demanding one conference for divorced parents is way off track. What if one parent needs to share info on a tough custody battle, a child's anger over daddy's new girlfriend, etc.? Teachers need to know if a child is struggling with a major transition,