How to Be a Sexist Man

Some people think sexism is damaging to society, but you don't care. You want women to earn less than men. You want your daughter to be a secretary and then a baby machine. It may be hard to overcome all those years of "sensitivity" brain washing, but here is how you can do it.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• A pipe, don't worry about Freud...Leci n'est pas une pipe
• A can of beer
• A recliner

1. Blame all her feelings, emotions and opinions on "the rag."
2. Buy her a vacuum cleaner and other household appliances for her birthday and Christmas.
3. Say things like, "The first sin was Cain killing Abel, but the first crime was God allowing women to speak."
4. Assume every girl you meet took Home Ec in high school and got an A, and if she didn't she's a lesbian.
5. Refer to your wife as your BMMB (Baby-Maker-Meal-Baker).
6. When your girl/wife wants to talk just point to the kitchen and say, "make me pie!"

Tips & Warnings

• Never refer to a woman by name, she is always "woman", "wife", or "girl".
• Use swear words liberally.
• Acts of kindness and fairness can be viewed as weak.