How to Get Over Someone

This article will (hopefully!) make the breakup process a little easier for you.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• A garbage can, delete and erase buttons, good friends to lean on, restraint

1. Step 1 is to cut off any and all communication. No calls, no texts, no emails.. nothing! I know that it's tempting to find out what they're doing.. and you may want to check up on them to see if they're missing you at all. Take it from me: they're not. They are getting along just fine without you, so don't look! It's only going to cause you more pain.
   
   This also goes for them trying to contact you. Don't pick up that call.. don't answer that email. All they're doing is playing with you. They want to know that you're still there and that you still care. Remember: you can say more with silence than you ever can with words.
   
   With all of this, you need to go ahead and take their contact information out of your computer, your phone, your life! We don't need those email addresses and numbers lying around, ready for you to access the minute you have one more shot or glass of wine than you should. Speaking of that, I know we all love to drink during a bad breakup, but alcohol is a depressant. I know that won't probably change anyone's tendencies but I just thought I'd throw that out there.
   
   The last form of communication that needs to be addressed is social networking sites like myspace, facebook and friendster. I know that you probably love your little myspace page, and posting pictures of you and your friends, and checking everyone else's pages like the stalker you are, but I have to break something to you. If your ex-someone is also on myspace, or your site of choice, you need to get off. Delete your profile and never look back. You'll be too tempted to check up on them and, believe me, one day you'll check your ex-someone's page and there'll be pictures of them with their new someone and their profile will one day say 'in a relationship' and you will want to die. Save yourself the pain and just get away from the whole scene.
2. Step 2 is cleansing. Get everything that reminds you of that person out of sight. Get a bag and go around your home, your cubicle, the trunk of your car (I don't know what you crazy people do) and bag up everything that reminds you of your former someone. And, please, don't get all dramatic and flush said items or burn them or throw them in the ocean. You will want to look at them again at some point in your life when you're not so bitter.
3. Step 3 is not the most honorable of steps, but it has to be done. You are going to be lonely. It's not easy to have someone to go home to and cuddle with at night and then all of a sudden not have anything to go home to but your cat, your TIVO and an empty fridge. So, you need to find someone new. This is not going to be the one, they're only good for right now. Find someone nice to cuddle and go to movies and dinners with and when you're done, then end it. I know this seems harsh.. and it is harsh, but enough's been done to you so you have every right to dish a little out yourself. Don't think of it as using, think if it as borrowing.. you're going to give it back when you're done.
4. Throughout all of this, be open and make sure you have someone, or someones, to talk to. Your friends will listen and be there for you.. that's why they're your friends. They'll help talk you off the ledge and they'll be there to congratulate you when you meet your new Mr. or Ms. Right.