How to Avoid Watching Chick Flicks

A chick flick is a film that divides the sexes. Women tend to find the contrived, unfunny circumstances that are standard chick flick conventions to be charming and forgivable as long as the male lead and female lead end up together. Besides When Harry Met Sally and Four Weddings and a Funeral, straight men would rather have a prostate exam than sit through a chick flick. Here’s some ways to avoid watching chick flicks.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Heart and nerves of steel
• Movie tickets
• Car
• Ace bandage

1. Suggest she goes with some of her girlfriends or gay male friends.

2. Buy one ticket for her movie and one for your movie.

3. “Accidentally” drive to the wrong theater.

4. Buy out all the tickets online for the screening she wants to see, then buy two tickets for the movie you want to see. Apologize that her movie is sold out and go see yours. If it’s a rental, call ahead and reserve the film for someone else.

5. Pretend to be extremely ill or “sprain” your ankle on the way to the theater. Hobble for a few hours if necessary.

6. Plan a romantic dinner at her favorite restaurant instead of the movie. Then forget to make reservations and go to the nearest sports bar.

7. Tell her that you heard Jessica Alba makes a cameo and you’re really excited to see it. Women hate Jessica Alba.

Tips & Warnings

• You may have to use two of the above if it’s Valentine’s Day.
• Don’t make any sort of deals where you’re contractually obligated to see a chick flick. Such as, “I’ll watch football if we go see the new Kate Hudson movie next weekend.” Delayed suffering is still suffering.

Resources

• Fandango
• Moviefone

[anonymousblicth]

on 8/14/2008 this is fucking retarded.
that so fucking gay i swear.
i wouldnt want a man that would do that to me.
plus,
all he should care about is being able to be with me... plus if its a really good chick flick like a walk to remember...
it'll allow them to hold us and cuddle ;)

[CCrock]

on 1/19/2008 I know guys hate chick flicks...but sometimes, watching a romantic flick with our man is just what we need to get in the mood...So it's not like there's nothing in it for you! lol.

[CCrock]

on 1/19/2008 I know guys hate chick flicks...but sometimes, watching a romantic flick with our man is just what we need to get in the mood...So it's not like there's nothing in it for you! lol.

[merrily1941]

on 1/19/2008 The most recent Chick Flick I saw was Persuasion on Masterpiece Theater, which is now called Masterpiece, isn't that brilliant. It was awful. Jane Austen would have thrown up.

[merrily1941]

on 1/19/2008 I choose one movie I like, and he chooses one movie he likes. We never whine. We take turns. This has worked. We have AGREED to do it!This above advice is pitiful. Just tell the person if you REALLY do not want to go see people having their heads chopped off. Let that person go along.