How to Join a Fertility Support Discussion Board

Having fertility problems can make you feel alone. While your sister has her fourth baby and your neighbor down the street jokes she's a "Fertile Myrtle," you might find your quest to get pregnant--or even ovulate--very isolating. Fortunately there are thousands of women going through the exact same experience who can help you through your journey--it just requires going online.

Instructions

Difficulty: Challenging

1. Lurk on various fertility support discussion boards before posting. The website for Taking Charge of Your Fertility, TCOYF.org, FertilityFriend.com and iVillage.com are popular discussion boards, but there are dozens on the Internet. If you're dealing with a specific type of infertility, you can narrow your search further by finding other women with the same disorder.
2. Get a feel for the personality of each discussion board. Some boards will be controversial and prone to cattiness, while others will be pleasant and supportive, but not as personal because of their enormous size. Try to find a board that seems both supportive yet individualized, so you'll get a chance to form a true friendship with a number of the women.
3. Post an introduction or a question on the discussion boards you feel most drawn to--no more than two or three so you can manage the replies. You can explain how long you've been trying to conceive--called TTC on most of these boards--if you've had miscarriages, what, if any, diagnoses you've had and also something personal, such as the city you're from, how long you've been married or whether you have any children.
4. Gage the boards from how people respond to your post. If they ignore you, it might be too impersonal a discussion board for you. If you're inundated with support, you might have found the right place to get support for your fertility problems.
5. Acclimate yourself with the fertility acronyms such as TTC and use any fertility tracking software available on the website. Then begin posting and participating in polls and discussions. These women might one day become your closest friends.

Tips & Warnings

• Be supportive of the other women on the fertility discussion boards. Just as you need help and feedback, they do, too.
• Sometimes hostilities erupt on discussion boards dealing with highly personal issues like fertility. Be prepared to deal with the occasional flame--or post cautiously about your personal life.