How to Build a Child's Resilience

You may think your child doesn't have to deal with moments of weakness since he can always come to you for advice. Children feel as much of an obligation to endure troubled times as you do. Whether it's problems between mom and dad, kids bullying them at school or a feeling that they'll never live up to society's standards, you need to teach your children to build resilience. Read on to learn how to toughen up your kid.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

1. Encourage your child to be open about the things that bother him. This can be difficult when it involves a parent, sibling or other family member. Airing painful feelings, however, gets rid of them and helps him build resilience in later life.
2. Maintain relations with your extended family and encourage her to reach out to people she particularly connects with. Accept that it may be easier for her to tell grandma certain things. The important thing is that she's talking about her pain.
3. Teach your child self-nurturing. Eating a balanced diet and exercising regularly now builds good habits later. Self-nurturing keeps the body strong, which makes it easier to be resilient when facing painful experiences.
4. Cultivate a positive self-image in your child. This is vital to helping her face adversity. You can't expect her to stand up to bullies or misplaced criticism if she automatically buys into every negative thing someone says about her.
5. Learn to look upon mistakes as learning tools and pass that philosophy onto your children. Realize that we learn the most from our biggest mistakes. This gives a positive spin to painful experiences.
6. Nurture your child's creativity. Self-expression builds resilience because a child who tells the world how he feels and what he thinks is less frustrated. Introduce your child to different modes of expression so he can find the ones best suited to his personality.
7. Volunteer with your child at a nursing home, pet shelter or other charity that's appropriate for children. Empathy promotes communication and harmony with the world around us, which builds resilience during painful times.

Tips & Warnings

• Tap into the American Psychology Association (APA) site for help on building your child's resilience (see Resources for link).
• Buy the highly rated book, "Raising Resilient Children" by Robert Brooks, Ph.D. and Sam Goldstein, Ph.D. Look for it on Amazon.