How to Win at Three-Card Monty

Three Card Monty: A time-honored classic among the ex-con circuit; a favorite among movie and TV directors when they want to establish a rough part of town; and a great place to network with gritty hookers and dope dealers. Sure, Three Card (as it’s called on the streets) is a scam--we’re not fooling ourselves, but it’s all part of the New York experience: Visit the Stature of Liberty; take in a lap dance at Scores; and drop a few twenties on Three Card. Of course, you can win a few twenties if you follow my lead.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

1. Three standard playing cards, one face card and two number cards, are scrambled around the top of a makeshift dealer table usually found on most New York street corners with light to medium traffic. You choose the face card and you double your money. That’s better odds than Vegas, baby!
2. Besides, Blackjack, Three Card is probably the easiest of all card games. Basically, it’s you, the dealer and three cards on the cardboard box that separates you both. The dealer’s going to show you all three cards; they’ll be two black number cards and one face card (usually the queen of hearts). The cards will also all be slightly creased down the middle, don’t worry about it though; it’s just so your dealer can shuffle them quicker.
3. he’ll scramble the cards face down for a few seconds and upon completion of the shuffle, he’ll ask you to point to the card that you think is the queen. Even though you kept your eye on the queen the entire time and you’d bet your parents entire retirement fund on it, you’re going to be wrong. Why? Because he’s actually using four cards and he palmed the queen before he shuffled the cards.
4. He’s going to let you win a few times to get your confidence up though. What you want to do after your third win is walk away from the table. There’s a very good chance you’re going to be followed when you leave the table and eventually mugged for everything you own. That’s why you have to read the next tip very carefully.

Tips & Warnings

• Don’t go alone, bring a friend, preferably male, preferably very large, and willing to take a bullet while you cower behind him like a girl. Secondly, know your surroundings: Make sure you’re aware of everyone around you, there very likely are plants waiting for you to drop your guard so they can pickpocket you.