How to Streak at a Sporting Event

Streaking is the time-honored tradition of getting naked and running across the field at a sporting event. People have been doing this for decades, either as a way to celebrate the game or to gain some temporary notoriety. To streak a sporting event is a tricky, risky proposition. However, with some careful planning and a willingness to get tackled by a team of big, burly security guards, you can probably pull it off. Read on to learn more.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Improve Your Odds of Success When You Streak at a Sporting Event

1. Get a few friends to help you. With a small group of people in on the plan, you'll increase your odds of success. Getting you out on the field unmolested is going to take team work.
2. Choose your seats carefully. You're going to want to sit in a place that gives you easy access to the field. Don't worry about finding an exit point, however. The chances of you escaping without getting tackled by security are almost non-existent.
3. Grease yourself up with baby oil (or cooking oil or butter or anything slick) before arriving at the stadium. Once you're naked and on the field, security will be chasing you. A nice coating of oil will make it much harder for them to get a grip on you.
4. Wear clothes that are easy to remove quickly. Of course, you don't want to show up at the stadium in a long trench coat or a bikini. That would just attract attention. In most cases, some loose pants (draw-string waists work nicely) and a t-shirt will suffice.
5. Designate one friend to create a diversion. You'll want this diversion to start mere moments before you rush the field. It doesn't matter what the diversion is, as long as it draws the attention of security to your friend. Throwing marbles onto the field or screaming loudly are two effective techniques.
6. Run onto the field while security is still distracted by your friend's diversionary tactics.
7. Begin ripping off your clothing once you're on the field. Continue to run while doing this. Once you're completely naked, you can choose to run in circles until security catches you or attempt to run for freedom through the nearest exit.

Tips & Warnings

• If you can convince a couple of other friends to streak with you, it will increase the chances of at least one of you getting all your clothes off before being tackled. After all, security guards will have a hard time subduing two or three of you all at once.
• Expect to be arrested afterward. There are heavy fines and even small amounts of jail time for streaking in most states. Even if you make it out of the stadium without being apprehended, you've almost certainly been caught on a security camera somewhere (and maybe even a television camera). Rest assured, the police will find you.

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