How to DJ in the Dark

As any experienced (and definitely any inexperienced) DJ will tell you, working the wheels of steel in front of a crowd is certainly a difficult business, but doing it in the dark is just taking the piss! Unfortunately for all of us vinyl was developed in the dark ages, which is the reason why it is black. Although this means it looks cool, it certainly doesn’t show up as easily as if it was painted glow-in-the-dark green or radiation exuding Ultra Violet and this causes problems for DJ’s. So what should we do!?

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

1. Buy a deck light (use www.decks.com or www.djsuperstore.com) with a bendable neck, which can be attached and detached from your decks within seconds.
2. Crack open a can of glow sticks and paint all your records with illuminating UV paint.
3. Attach a pocket torch light to your hat like a miner or Geordie LaForge from Star Trek
4. Get your mates to hold their mobile phones near your decks and shine their screens onto your records.
5. Get members of the crowd to donate their glow sticks to you and hang them around your booth for psychedelic lamination!
6. Sacrifice one of your decks to the Devil by starting a small, spinning fire out of matches, record sleeves and beer mats. The crowd will think you’re crazy in a good way, the club owners will think you’re crazy in a bad way, but either way, you’ll have light!
7. Find the electric generator for the club you’re playing and turn it off. With any luck the back-up safety lights will come on, ruining the mood but providing loads of pure white light!
8. Take a trip outside to look for a nearby construction site. Look for flashing safety lights. If you can find them, “borrow” them and return them later on, once you’ve finished your “blinding” set!
9. Go Gothic. Use candles, but be careful to prevent dribbly wax from oozing onto your decks or your records. Wax builds up in vinyl grooves and is difficult to remove.
10. Go hippy. Get some fairy lights to decorate your decks. Incense, roll-ups and magic tea could perfect the change in style.
11. Use the force. Most DJ’s spend so much time at their decks that they should be able to mix, scratch and beat match with their eyes closed. DJ’ing in the dark is a great way of testing your Jedi skill, and you don’t even have to close your eyes as you can’t see anything anyway!

Tips & Warnings

• Always carry a couple deck lights in your kit bag. You never know how dark a venue will be.