How to Deal With Backstabbing Friends

Rarely does one have the opportunity to go through life without encountering at least one backstabbing friend. These friends can be insidious, as they conduct their dirty deeds behind your back. When you discover the betrayal, you might be surprised, hurt and left wondering how to deal with this friend.

Instructions

1. Confirm the misdeed with multiple friends. Communication distorts as it travels. A friend embellishes another's eye rolling with imagined defamatory remarks.

2. Allow the friend one opportunity to make an honest mistake. What seems to be a backstabbing incident may be an error in judgment. Tell your friend, "I'm sure you didn't mean to be unkind, but I'd like to clarify what I heard."

3. Tailor the response to the offense. If a friend is pleasant to your face but insults your fashion sense around others, she may be struggling with insecurities. Offer your sympathy to your other friends and laugh it off.

4. Take the high road. It's tempting to respond to a rumor with equally nasty gossip about the offender. However, this lowers your credibility and status among your other friends, leaving them to wonder whom the snarky one really is.

5. Give the silent treatment to your friend. Sometimes, power means not respponding at all. If you must interact frequently with this person at work or in class, be polite but cool. Denied the satisfaction of your reaction, the friend might back off.

6. Reconsider the friendship. Friendships build on trust; wondering how your friend is going to trash you next unravels trust. When the pain outweighs the pleasure, it's time to get out.