How to Set Boundaries in Relationships

By eHow Relationships & Family Editor

Rate: (3 Ratings)

Relationships of all kinds can be complicated and difficult to maneuver. This is especially true when the relationships aren't healthy. If either person in the relationship feels overburdened in some way, then the bond will not last. Set boundaries to keep your relationships functioning properly. Here are a few steps to help you set boundaries in your relationships.

Instructions

Difficulty: Challenging

Step1
Admit that it's not working. The hardest part about making a change is usually acknowledging that it needs to happen. Don't sugarcoat the situation. If you are unhappy, then only you can turn that around.
Step2
Take stock. Analyze your relationships to see what works and what doesn't. Note whether you think the other person will be receptive to the necessary changes. Prepare yourself accordingly.
Step3
Get clear about your needs. In order to set boundaries in your relationships, you must know what your deal breakers are. Knowing the changes you want to make is great, but you should also have an idea of how you want things to change as well. Be willing to compromise when necessary.
Step4
Say no. Do not do things because you feel guilty or obligated. Do not over commit. Exercise your right to choice and take care of yourself.
Step5
Communicate effectively. Once you are sure about your stance, you need to articulate it. Let the other person(s) know how you feel. Present your case firmly and compassionately.
Step6
Deal with the consequences. When you set boundaries in relationships, you must be prepared for some backlash. Many people don't like change, but that doesn't mean you should back down. Allow a reasonable period of time for adjustment.

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on 1/19/2008 For parents whose adult children refuse to grow up: Realize you are half of the problem. Cut off the internet and the cable. Get local telephone service only. Do not do any chores for them whatsoever. If they run out of clean underwear, oh well. Find anything good you can and praise it, and do not NOT live your own life. One mother I know has moved into a one-bedroom senior apartment complex. That worked. Free at last, free at last!

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eHow Article:  How to Set Boundaries in Relationships

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