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Step 1
Remember that no one is any better than you are. If someone can perform well in a social environment, why can't you? Really, what's the worst thing that could happen? Why do you feel better when talking in front of your family and friends, but not when dealing with new faces? We're all people with the same abilities. Stop wondering what others will think of you. Just get out there and do it.
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Step 2
Stop worrying ahead. When dealing with social situations, for example, people immediately start thinking about the public's reaction. Furthermore, have you noticed it's never a positive one? Do not get ahead of yourself. Do not start thinking "what if"; This will only turn any (negative) possible outcome into reality. Live in the present.
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Step 3
Let's say you're in an atmosphere where you don't know anyone, and no one knows you. Instead of feeling awkward and shy, take this opportunity to make a great first impression. Remember, people don't know you, therefore they can't tell what to expect of you. This is your chance to shine before them and pass with flying colors.
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Step 4
If you need to speak, do it out loud. This will automatically send a signal to your audience that you're in control of the situation, and nothing can stop you. On the other hand, if you let people know you're shy by not letting your words be noticeable, they will immediately think you're a failure before they even know you.
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Step 5
Be yourself, and stop letting anyone else into your head. If someone can do a fancier job at explaining a problem, it doesn't mean your methods are useless; It only means you have another way of exploring issues which might even teach people a thing or two.
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Step 6
Control your breathing. Instead of feeling tense and breathing from your chest, stop and breathe normally from your stomach. This will get you incredibly relaxed, and thus allow both your words and your self-image to be exposed beautifully.
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Step 7
Physically relax, followed by mentally. The best way to start is by relaxing your muscles. If you're making a fist, stop this bad habit. Take control of yourself in order to manage the situation you're presented with. Once in a stable state of mind, you will notice your body language, expressions, and words will flow naturally.
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Step 8
If socializing, a very useful tip is to keep your eye at someone you know from the crowd. If this person makes you feel at ease, try to focus most of your attention on him/her (while occasionally staring at others, of course.)
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Step 9
Model someone you admire. Do you know a motivational speaker, or a good, confident comedian on TV? How well do they perform? Try to act like them while teaching yourself new techniques. Model the way they talk, how they behave, as well as their body language and movements. If you're in front of a crowd, never stay still - Keep taking small steps to express a confident, successful body language to your audience.
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Step 10
It's okay to prepare in advance for a situation, especially a social one. However, try not to overly practice what you're going to say. In the end, this will only cause you to draw a blank when you realize that not every word remained stuck in your head. Instead, know what you will say, but make the final practice when you're actually ready to demonstrate it.
Comments
tawfik said
on 6/13/2009 very intresting article.thanks!
slphilbrick said
on 10/31/2008 A great 5* article ! Excellent points and well thought out !
Pixie1976 said
on 7/11/2008 Excellent five star article, great attitude.