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Step 1
Establish trust in the relationship. Once you've dated someone for a while and feel that you can trust them with your past, sit down to a relaxing dinner or choose some other stress-free environment to talk about your sexual abuse history.
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Step 2
Be open and honest. While it can be uncomfortable to discuss, telling someone about a history of sexual abuse can help your partner understand more about you and your thoughts, actions and reservations.
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Step 3
Allow your partner to ask questions. By making your partner feel as if questions are acceptable, you create an atmosphere of trust. He is likely to be very concerned and somewhat shocked or surprised by your news, so questions can help him come to terms with your experiences.
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Step 4
Remember that you are in charge. You should never have to talk about your experiences in more detail or for longer than you're absolutely comfortable. Communicate clearly and openly with your partner to maintain a level of comfort for yourself.
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Step 5
Prepare yourself for a mixed reaction. Sometimes partners don't understand how exactly to receive news that their boyfriend or girlfriend was the victim of sexual abuse. They may become distant or quiet. Often this is simply a reaction to their shock, discomfort, and lack of understanding of how to comfort you. Give them some time and space, but realize that some people never come to terms with a partner's sexual abuse history.
