How to Avoid Passing a Soul Mate By

Mr. Right is there--the problem is that he's overlooked, ignored or women don't want anything to do with him. All the nice guys are taken because women who know themselves--and what they want--grab these men. And they do this before the other women realize that another one of their "dudes" turned out to be a "dud."

Instructions

1. Look deep inside yourself. Find out what you truly need in a partner, and be honest with yourself. Sit down and write everything that you expect from a mate. List characteristics that you're looking for. Dig deep. You have to know the real you before you capture your soul mate.

2. Review every man that you thought was your soul mate. Step back from your life, remove all biases and emotions, recall common traits and events. If you find that all men are "drama types," it's because you've set yourself up to be attracted to those types of men.

3. Turn to a clean sheet of a long pad. Write down all the bad things that happened in all your relationships. Make separate lists for each boyfriend, husband or lover. Look for warning signs in each list. Figure out what it was that caused you to pick Mr. Wrong.

4. Make recommendations to yourself and resolve to change your search tactics. Understand that when you go to clubs, you're not just having fun, you're meeting a possible future husband. He won't always be exactly what you're looking for.

5. Think long term. With men, what you see is what you get. Understand that the saying, "it's the quite guys you should watch out for," doesn't apply in the flirtation scene. Pick a quite, non social man if you want a husband that doesn't party with all the women when you're not watching.

6. Treat the flirtation game like a shopping event. As an experienced buyer, you've trained yourself to go after the best quality and deals. You know you won't benefit from these simply by sitting in the store and waiting for them to land on your lap. Don't abandon this tactic when looking for your soul mate. Go for Mr. Right and claim him. Let Mr. Wrong approach the women sitting around waiting for Mr. Right.

Tips & Warnings

• If you feel that all men are jerks, drama queens or have the same undesirable trait, it's because you're attracted to those types of guys. Not all guys are like that. Change what you're looking for to break the cycle.

• Take the flirtation initiative. If you see someone interesting, go for him. Do for him what women expect men to do for them. You have a better chance of finding your soul mate this way than if you sat there and wait for guys to pick you up.