How to Be a Good Stepmom to Boys

Becoming a stepmom can be intimidating. But being a stepmom to boys can be especially challenging, particularly if you don't know a lot about boys and the sometimes baffling way their minds work. Here are some steps to follow to be a good stepmom to boys.

Instructions

1. Try to get along with their mother. Always say positive things about her in front of the boys. Once she sees that you respect her, your relationship with her and her boys will be that much better.

2. Understand most boys are very close to their mother. This does not mean they can't love you, too. It will just be a different kind of love. It may take some time, so be patient and the boys will soon get used to you.

3. Leave the discipline to their dad. Disciplining the boys is not your job. You are there as a back-up, to reinforce his rules. If they are misbehaving, let him deal with it. If it is a small thing, go ahead and take the initiative but just don't overstep your role.

4. Communicate with your husband and come up with a game plan. Discuss what is inappropriate behavior. This way if he is not around the boys know that you will lay down the same rules as their father and they should behave accordingly.

5. Realize that boys like to play rough and wrestle. For someone who is not used to having boys around, this can be a big eye opener.

6. Have fun with them. As their stepmom, you can be silly and playful. Take them on outings, watch goofy movies and eat too much ice cream. Boys love unexpected treats, and this will give you an opportunity to bond with them and build a relationship. Just remember that even fun has boundaries and sometimes boys don't know when to quit. Let them know beforehand when they have to go to bed, go back home or turn off the TV. If they know ahead of time when fun time is over, they are less likely to argue and pout.

Tips & Warnings

• Boys are always hungry. To avoid overdoing sugar, find out what kind of healthy snacks they like.

• If you start feeling like you are drowning in testosterone, take some time off for yourself. Being a stepmom can be stressful, and retail therapy works wonders.

Resources

• Tips for Stepmothers
• Online support for Second wives and Stepmothers