How to Get Rid of an Unwanted House Guest

It is really easy to be an unwanted house guest; it also guarantees that you will never get invited back again. If you dread getting invitations to stay over or visit, here are some ways that will help get you off the invite list.

Instructions

1. Drop by unannounced and surprise your host. Bring along a pet (a large dog would be preferable) and an additional friend. Don't forget to ask to stay for a few extra days.

2. Ask for rides to all the places you need to go. Act frustrated and put guilt trap on him if he can't take you sightseeing. In fact, remind him that it is his responsibility to take some days off to take you around.

3. Help yourself to the food in the refrigerator and pantry. Since you are the guest, you don't have to ask for permission.

4. Don't offer to help out with any chores around the house such as doing the dishes or taking out the garbage. Don't make your bed each morning and leave your clothes and shoes anywhere you want in the house.

5. Use any shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, cologne, hairbrush or anything you can find in the bathroom. If the bathroom gets dirty, tell your host that it's time to clean it. You are the guest; you deserve clean facilities.

6. Refuse to eat any home cooked meal if it does not suit your taste. Be honest and tell her that the food tastes nasty and makes you sick to the stomach.

7. Make yourself at home. Prop your feet on the furniture if you are tired or when watching the TV and take control of the remote.

8. Ask your host to pick up food or any item that you may need when he goes to the store. You don't have to reimburse or thank him since you should be able to expect these small favors.

9. Make long distance telephone calls if you need to and talk for as long as you want.

10. Take anything that you might need along with you when you leave. You should ask your host to drop you off as well.

11. Don't bother about writing thank you cards or giving a gift of gratitude. If you happened to bring something, sneak it back and return it to the store for a refund. It's the thought that counts, really.