How to Get a Jewish Divorce
One of the most painful areas in Jewish life is the issue of obtaining a Jewish divorce, or a Get. While divorce has traditionally been discouraged, Jewish law has always permitted a couple to part if there is excessive bitterness between them. It is extremely important for a Jewish couple to obtain a proper Jewish divorce or a Get and not to rely merely on a secular divorce.
Instructions
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See a rabbi as soon as you decide to give your wife a divorce. He can recommend a scribe who is knowledgeable in the laws of how to write a proper Jewish divorce document, or a Get.
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Ensure the sofer is writing the Get purely for you and your wife and is not using paper that can be erased, a form with blanks or any material but parchment. The rabbinical court (group of three rabbis) will also check these details.
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Confirm the Get is signed by two witnesses after the Get is written by the scribe.
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Make the statement, "This is your Get, and accept this as your Get. You shall therewith be divorced from me; you are untied free and permitted to any man." The rabbinical court should provide you with the text of this statement, usually said in Hebrew.
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Watch your now ex-wife take the Get in her hands and walk a few steps back. The Jewish divorce is not official until the wife accepts the Get. This document is often destroyed, and a rabbi draws up an official divorce document.
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Discuss any details and questions you have before this actual procedure is performed.
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Tips & Warnings
Seek out a rabbi who is already familiar with your situation, based on discussions in the past about your marital problems. This should help the process go more smoothly.
Do not live in the same house with your wife after you have decided to divorce her. You must live somewhere else until the divorce is final.
It is essential to obtain a kosher Get or Jewish divorce and not to assume a secular divorce is sufficient. Without a religious Jewish divorce, the woman's children in subsequent marriages will be considered illegitimate.