How to Stop Being Hit On at a Bar

Nightlife can be a jungle of would-be Tarzans searching for their reluctant Jane. Women at a bar with friends are often forced to contend with men who feel they must want to be picked up. Some men try the smooth approach, while others are just too clueless to take a hint. If you find yourself experiencing unwanted advances at a bar, here are some tips to enjoying a harassment-free night.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

1. Use unwelcoming body language. Although it is appropriate to make eye contact during the initial greeting, limit it to a glance followed by a short, tight smile. You need to give the impression that you are not horribly offended, but would indeed be mightily inconvenienced by any further advances.
2. Tell him you have a significant other, even if it is a lie. If you would really rather not talk, feel free to use this little falsehood. The boyfriend or husband excuse is a plausible reason to end the conversation without hurting any body's feelings.
3. Make eye contact with people who can help you escape from an unwelcome conversation. Scan the room for a friend, acquaintance or server who can help you out of the situation. When going out with friends, have some kind of signal to indicate that you need help.
4. Remove yourself from the vicinity. Take an imaginary phone call, spot an imaginary acquaintance or use the bathroom. Make no indication that you will continue to talk when you return. Though this is frequently effective, the downside is that you might have to give up your spot.
5. Say you aren't interested, clearly and firmly. He will go away quickly. If you feel bad about this, remind yourself that you deserve to have fun. Having a guy you don't like hang around the entire night is an intrusion on your personal space and should be treated as such. Stand up for yourself.

Tips & Warnings

• When dispatching an unwelcome suitor from your side, time is of the essence. Smart pick-up artists will try to draw you into conversation by asking open-ended questions: don't bite. If you already know you aren't interested, cut contact off immediately.
• Do not, under any circumstances, make physical contact with a man who is trying to hit on you. He will perceive even the slightest, most insignificant contact as permission to press ahead. If he offers his hand for you to shake, refusing it is a good way to get your point across early on.
• Don't be unnecessarily rude. Telling somebody you are not interested is an act of mercy; insulting them is cruel and unacceptable. Even polite rejection is insult enough.