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Step 1
Know that provocative behavior with the opposite sex and extramarital affairs are not normal behavior in a relationship.
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Step 2
Refuse to allow humiliation, criticizing and put-downs, whether in public or at home. Sarcasm and an unpleasant tone of voice are also part of that.
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Step 3
Remember that it is not normal for your significant other to be unreasonably jealous or have extreme moodiness. These are signs of insecurity and should be a warning sign.
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Step 4
Call your significant other's bluff. If he threatens to leave or give you ultimatums, show him the door. Cut him out right then.
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Step 5
Beware of withdrawal of approval, appreciation or affection as punishment. If your significant other is refusing to communicate because she is angry, this is also a warning sign.
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Step 6
Be brave. Using looks, gestures or actions to make others afraid is abusive behavior. So is trying to control others by blaming or forcing the victim to become financially dependent on the abuser.
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Step 7
Hold fast to your righteous anger at being manipulated. Having concerns not be taken seriously, mocked or denied is part of the abuse.
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Step 1
Avoid thinking it is your fault. This is what the abuser intends to accomplish when he abuses you.
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Step 2
Get rid of an abuser the second she begins any form of abuse, even emotional. Abuse usually will only get worse, not better.
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Step 3
Know it isn't funny when the abuser is using jokes to hide verbal abuse.
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Step 4
Placing restrictions on communication is not a good sign. Giving out a list of acceptable topics to be discussed is definitely another form of abuse.
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Step 5
Show what is important. An abuser will often keep you from even bringing up the subject of something important to you by taking emotional support and confidence away. He may make it seem like the subjects are not important and may even "forget" anything important to you.
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Step 6
"Fire the maid." Don't allow yourself to be ordered around. It is not your job to clean up after your abuser.
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Step 7
Get out of any relationship that has these problems, and seek counseling to keep from getting in a similar relationship.
Comments
trulylove said
on 5/21/2009 Hi,I was in an abusive relationship for years. the only thing that came out of it was my beautiful daughter that I love dearly; she is my world. I dealt with the physical abuse that ended when our relationship ended which to me was difficult but at last i was free. The jerk wasn't even man enough to tell me that our relationship was over. He just called me at work one day and casually asked me if it was ok for him to introduce our daughter to a friend. I asked him what like a female? and he just said yes. We were engaged at the time. Anyway I was shocked beyond words I clearly told him no not until she understood that we would no longer be a family. my daughter was eight and had just lost her grandfather and i my dad in the most horrible way. As hurt as I was I felt free because I thought he could no longer hurt me. Wasi ever wrong. This man continued to abuse me almost on a dai...
bnfjw0249 said
on 1/27/2009 This might be more useful if it were more gender neutral. It is obviously written by someone feeling a woman has been an abuser. The problem here is that a woman that has been abused may feel it's all her fault if she's just been beaten down and can't clearly see the example as a he/she statement.
carra said
on 10/20/2008 I am currently in an abusive relationship and i need help and as i read more upon the different types of abuse i become more educated and motivaed to stop it. It takes time to reverse the damage but to know that it is reversable is great to know because i was afraid that i would be lonely for the rest of my life due to the fact that i thought i was going to be like this forever i do want help and also am taking small steps to making my life happy! so for all of the people who wear my shoe size shoes aren't ment to hurt your feet they are suppose to help you walk comfortably so lets go shoe shopping!