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Step 1
Think through your concerns regarding the person or happening in your life, noting exactly what was done that hurt you. Share your feelings about the matter with someone you know and trust.
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Step 2
Get perspective on what is happening with your feelings. Realize that your main stress is due to thoughts and physical upset you are suffering now, and the hurt you endured is in the past. This realization can help to heal hurt feelings.
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Step 3
Practice a simple stress management technique when you are feeling particularly upset at the past. This can be as effortless as closing your eyes and taking in deep breaths. Stop what you're doing and go for a walk, rest if possible or talk to a friend.
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Step 4
Focus your energy toward seeking another way to overcome negativity by focusing on positive goals. Seek new ways to get what you want and need from relationships and life.
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Step 5
Know that practicing forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciling with the person that hurt you. Forgiving is to find peace.
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Step 6
Commit yourself to do what you have to do to feel better. Forgiveness is for yourself--not anyone else.
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Step 7
Remember that your best revenge is living well. Look for the love, beauty and kindness in your life rather than dwelling on the hurt from the past. Forgiveness is about personal power.
