How to Marry Above One's Station

Marrying above one's station has been the source of fairy tales, mythology, and Hollywood movies. It's also a way to elevate your social and economic status without going to the bother of conquering a country or creating a billion dollar corporation. See how it's done.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

1. Emulate the most celebrated of all upwardly mobile matrimonies. Use your innocence, feminine guile, and beauty at a social event where an eligible member of the Royal family is wandering around, looking for his true love. Be mysterious but leave some clue as to your identity—a glass slipper will sometimes suffice.
2. Pose as a reclamation project. Though you have intelligence, a loving heart and ambition, present yourself as a member of a lower social class who has so few graces (particularly with regard to the spoken language) that you become an obvious project for an egotistical aristocrat. While he labors to pass you off as a member of his class, dazzle him with your new found sophistication and elegance. If you've been called Liza, eventually go by your full name, Eliza.
3. Become a movie star. Choose roles that emphasize your femininity but are never tawdry. Though you come from a relatively modest background, carry yourself with dignity and speak with an air almost aristocratic but still warm and engaging. When the Prince of Monaco proposes, say yes.
4. Join the Queen's Dragoon Guards. Develop your equestrian abilities and win an event with a confusing name like the Badminton Horse Trials while never lifting a racket, thus impressing a princess. Marry her.
5. Forsake any pretense about titles and go for the greenbacks. Make an open declaration as a gold digger and join a dating site called sugardaddie.com.

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