How to Deal With Difficult Adults

Dealing with adults at work or at school on a daily basis can be a challenge. Sometimes you work with people who are hard to get along with or you may even live with people who are difficult to deal with. Finding the right balance to dealing with difficult adults can be, well, difficult. But if you have the right tactics in place, handling difficult adults can be managed.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

1. Determine if you really need to deal with a particular adult or set of adults. If there is no valid reason to have to be around them, then avoid them altogether. Just deal with them as minimally as possible. If you don't have to go that particular fast-food restaurant and deal with that particularly rude cashier or waitress, then don't. Find another place to eat lunch.

2. Spend quality time with the difficult person to learn their ways, how they think, how they feel, and possibly even what makes them difficult. This will give you some insight as to why they are the type of person they are and what makes them act difficult.

3. Convey your feelings to the difficult adult very openly and honestly. Let them know what you will and will not tolerate. Surprisingly, they will respect this forwardness and may actually become less difficult for you to deal with.

4. Communicate frequently with them to keep the relationship always at a point of honesty. Talking through email, phone or leaving messages will always keep things open and keep the guesswork out of gauging the person's feelings or you theirs.

5. Encourage the adult frequently, as you would a child, to let them know when their behavior is acceptable.

Tips & Warnings

• Do not over-do the encouragement when dealing with an adult. Too much affirmation too often will make you seem disingenuous and will make the adult suspicious of your actions.

Resources

• Tolerance.org offers tips and advice on how to work with adults in the workforce.
• Fastcompany.com offers exercises designed to build an outline of strengths and weaknesses in adults.
• Difficult People gives information and resources on how to cope with difficult people.