How to Stop Feeling Like a Victim

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Stop Feeling Like a Victim

Victims are plentiful in society. And where there are victims, there are bullies. Despite zero tolerance programs, bullying still continues at schools, in the home and in the workplace. Victims may find the answer lies in a change of attitude. When people stop feeling and acting helpless, they take power from bullies. Read these steps on how to stop feeling like a victim.

Instructions

    • 1

      Fake feeling brave. Often fear causes more problems than an actual person. At the beginning, you may have to pretend to be brave. Don't worry. Feeling brave follows acting brave.

    • 2

      Respond unexpectedly. When a victim responds in anger, it gives the other person a reason to act angry. But if you ignore a behavior, bullies eventually stop doing it. Remember the Golden Rule; treat others as you would like to be treated.

    • 3

      Recall early childhood advice about not being a tattle tale. Telling on someone gives her a reason to be mad. As long as no one is in actual physical danger, not telling might win you the respect of the bully.

    • 4

      Laugh about it. Humor often defuses tense situations. When someone insults you, make a joke. The bully expects anger or defensiveness. When you return an insult with humor, he doesn't know how to respond.

    • 5

      Ignore minor mishaps. If someone shoves you, an automatic reaction is to shove back a little harder. Then that person shoves even harder, and well, you get the picture. Ask yourself what would happen if you never shoved back.

    • 6

      Treat your enemies like friends. If a friend or family tells you something about yourself, it's likely because they care about you. When you tell someone "thank you for telling me that," you take away any power they have for hurting you.

    • 7

      Believe in yourself. You know that you're not stupid, so there's no reason to believe either a boss or the bully on the playground when they call you stupid. A confident person does not project victimhood, but self assurance.

Tips & Warnings

  • Consistency is your best defense. Victims who always respond in a way designed to defuse bullying stop the behavior and quit being victims. But if you react in anger or tears after the fifth time, bullies know they can break you and continue acting mean.

  • No one has the right to physically assault you. This is against the law and should be reported.

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