How to Teach Responsibility with Chores

Parents want more responsible children, particularly as children grow older. One of the most successful ways to teach responsibility is right at your fingertips—chores! With the busy lives of over-scheduled kids, chores have fallen by the wayside. Yet doing chores instills a sense of responsibility in children that will apply in other parts of their lives. Follow these steps to teach your child responsibility with chores.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

1. Start children with chores at a young age. Toddlers want to help. Assigning jobs like putting up toys or dusting makes little ones feel like an important member of the family. And a toddler who is used to doing chores can turn into a pre-adolescent who won't fight you about chores. Well, they may still fight you--but not as much!
2. Teach your child the importance of doing a job well by demonstrating how to do a new job. Supervise chores until a child has proven proficiency. Watch your child's self-esteem grow with each accomplishment.
3. Allow children to learn from mistakes. You can teach your child to separate his laundry. But if he ignores that advice, he might end up with pink underwear. Chances are wearing pink underwear will make a bigger impression than anything you can say.
4. Show kids that there are consequences to actions. Instead of telling a child that she must vacuum on a specific day, allow her to choose when to do it as long as it's done before the end of the week. Perhaps chores not completed by Friday night means she doesn't get to go to the movies with her friends. This consequence is much more effective than nagging.
5. Recognize a child's increasing independence by increasing responsibility with chores. The child whose job was once to bring his laundry to you can be doing his own laundry by 12 years of age. The kid who can clean a bathroom, wash dishes and cook a meal is a college kid who can take care of himself.
6. Make chores fun. Chores don't always have to be sheer drudgery. Some children want to learn how to cook or enjoy working in the yard. Allow kids to pick some chores because they want to do them. Play music while doing chores.

Tips & Warnings

• Create a colorful chore chart for younger children, perhaps using stickers to indicate completed chores. Kids enjoy seeing a visual reminder of their efforts.
• Ask children for input about chores, including what should be done and how often. This helps give them ownership of the chore plan.
• Don't redo a child's chore. It's not perfection you're after, but increasing responsibility and a sense of self-worth. Re-doing a child's chore send the message that they aren't capable.
• It may easier to do the chores yourself, but don't. If you do everything for your kids, you teach your child helplessness.