How to Raise a Child With Empathy

To become a loving and caring adult, a child must be raised with empathy. Follow these steps to teach your children the art of empathy.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

1. Teach by example. Observation is how children learn. Children watch everything you do and will mimic you. They will learn, from you, how to react to the emotions of others.

2. Teach your child how to react to another person's feelings by showing your own empathy. A child will learn empathy when they see you hug a friend who is crying, when you order flowers for someone who has died or show compassion for a homeless person.

3. Explain to your child how the other person must be feeling. Help him relate it to his own life. For example, if your child blurts out "look how funny that man looks," make it a learning experience.

4. Explain to your child the other person feels sad because of what was said about him. Scolding or embarrassing your child for blurting out his observations may make him less open to your own teaching. Instead, tell him that the man had his feelings hurt by the outburst.

5. Compare his own hurt feelings from a previous experience to the situation at hand. Remind him of a difficult time for him such as "remember when Mary called you a name?" and then help him remember how he felt. Compare his own feelings to whatever the "funny looking man" might be feeling right now.

6. Ask your child "how would you feel if," and then give an example, such as "how would you feel if someone made fun of your blue jacket?"

7. Teach your child that everyone has something that can be made fun of, including him.

8. Explain body language to your child. Teach him how to "read" other people by the way they look. You can say, "he looks so sad" if someone is crying or ready to cry; point out the teary eyes or trembling lips.

9. Be empathetic yourself, show compassion for strangers and loved ones. Your child will pick up on how to react to others in distress. Explain why you are sending flowers for a funeral. "Uncle Tom's mother just died. He is very sad. He loved his mother very much, just like you love me. You would be very sad if you lost me too. We are sending flowers to try and cheer up Uncle Tom, because we love him and want him to know that he is not alone, even though his mother died."

Resources

• This is a great site for help with teaching your child empathy.
• Dr. Kutner has a wealth of information and help for your child.