How to Compete With Other Lemonade Stands

So you want to compete in the fast-paced, winner-take-all world of lemonade stands. This is not child's play; this is business and business is war. You have to out-think, out-squeeze and out-sell everybody just to stay afloat. Watch your back, and follow these steps to fun and profit.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Lemonade
• Lemonade stand
• Thirst for success

1. Scout out a location. Look for sun-scorched work sites with lots of parched construction workers, or perhaps a day-care center filled with thirsty toddlers who have this week's allowance burning holes in their pockets.
2. Pay attention to shifting markets. For instance, if your competitor's lemonade stand is set up one block from the local bus stop, you set up shop a half a block closer to all those tired, thirsty riders of public transportation.
3. Stake out your territory. If your lemonade stand needs to be on private property, cut in the landowner for a piece of the action. They can scare the bejesus out of anyone foolish enough to try to move in on your turf. This is especially effective if they are old and scary looking.
4. Choose your recipe carefully. If you're old-school, get out the cutting board, lemon-squeezer, ice cubes and sugar. Or you can cut costs on production; there are a lot of lemonade mixes out there. Buy in bulk and slap your label on them. No one will ever know.
5. Advertise. Strap a sign for your lemonade stand to your dog and let him loose. Or paint a sign on your dad's car. Be careful though, as both of these options carry risk, and can bite back.

Tips & Warnings

• Industrial sabotage is such a dirty practice, so don't even think about spiking your competitors' lemonade with vinegar or taking the screws out of their card table.