How to Deal with a Stubborn Teenager
The teenage years can be difficult for parents and teens alike. During this time between childhood and adulthood, teens want to declare their independence and do things their own way. Unfortunately, they are not mature enough to make all of their own decisions, so conflicts arise. Here are some tips for dealing lovingly and appropriately with teens.
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Instructions
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Listen. Parents of children are used to giving opinions, but during the teen years it's best to listen first and then respond. Teens often become less stubborn when they know they are being heard.
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Remember your teen years. If you spend some time looking back, you might recall how difficult these years were. Although you still have to take a firm stand on certain issues, being empathetic will help to make a challenging situation a little easier.
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Limit debate time. Some stubborn teens will debate for hours and chip away at your resolve. Try to listen, state your position and end the discussion.
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Pick your battles. Decide what is important to you. Do you want your teen to be a good student? Are you concerned with how your teen dresses? Is attending church important to you? Identify what is important and try to ignore small rebellions.
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Hang in there. Most teenagers pass through these years intact and turn into pleasant, productive adults.
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Tips & Warnings
Groups like "Because I Love You--BILY" provide support for parents of teens who have crossed the line between stubbornness and unsafe rebellion. Your board of education or other community groups may also offer parenting classes or support groups.
If your teen is exhibiting risky behavior involving sex, drugs, alcohol or other dangers, don't ignore it. Ask your family physician to refer you to an adolescent psychologist.
