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Step 1
Talk to your husband about how his lack of help is making you feel. Let him know that you feel as if you are left to take care of everything. Try not to use a condescending or blaming sort of voice.
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Step 2
Assert yourself and make sure that your husband knows you're serious that things have to change. If you don't put your foot down, then he might think you're just in one of your moods or it's PMS. Sometimes they just don't realize how serious it is and need a nudge to understand it from your point of view.
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Step 3
Write a note to your husband describing how you feel. Sometimes things sink in deeper for a man when he reads things at his own pace and in his desired tone. It also assures that all his focus is on what you have to say.
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Step 4
Think about what your husband does do around the house. Maybe he takes care of the yard, works on the cars or fixes leaky plumbing as a way of contributing around the house. Be sure that you're not just expecting too much of him.
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Step 5
Check your expectations. Perhaps your husband works hard all day in a physically demanding job or long hours with excessive overtime, and he really may be too exhausted to help. Lower your expectations or wait until the weekend to ask him to help.
Comments
sluna75 said
on 4/16/2008 Great article. My husband does work very hard, and I'm a stay-at-home mom. I have a typical honey to-do list that I put up on things that need repair or yard work that needs to be done or stuff I just get do myself because of watching the baby. He'll do it on his days off work and everything usually gets done without any problems. My expectations are low, and I am a relaxed person (hate stress) so I try not to stress out much about the house work. My house is clean and my husband is wonderful. OH yea, he does take out the garbage and bring in the mail everyday, plus he rinses out his dirty plates... I'm very blessed..:)