How to get in shape! (THE RIGHT WAY!)

This article is dedicated to all the people in the world that have been called the following: Fatty, Chubbs, Fatass, McDonald's, Greasy, 50% of McDonald's profit, or if you somehow own a membership card to McDonald's!

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• The ability to get your fatass up!

1. Do lots of sit-ups! Would'nt you be the next Chuck Norris if you weighed 500 lbs. and could out-sit-up this guy! Plus your friends might not believe it, but you could possibly truthfully say, "on the outside I'm fat, on the inside, I have a six-pack!"
2. Run 2 miles a day, if you are in the "extremely fatass" category, run 20!
3. McDonald's is the new subway for you, so just pretend everything there is under 1000 calories, so you don't want it. Instead go to the local salad market, buy a years worth of salad food and don't eat it all in one day!

Tips & Warnings

• If you feel the need to sprint the 2 miles, go ahead!
• Keep chanting fatass to yourself for as long as needed!
• Don't go overboard with this!