How to Deal With School Fights

Fights on school grounds have very serious consequences. Some schools have gone as far as calling the police and expelling the students involved in a fight. Parents of young children should deal with school fights in a calm way. This helps prevent fights later on and avoids greater consequences.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Go to the school when you are informed a fight has taken place. Ask the adult who reported the fight what they think happened. Have your child present at this meeting. Ask for all the details and ask any questions you have.
2. Ask the child for their side of the story. Allow her to tell her side of the story without any interruption or questions.
3. Discuss any discrepancies between different versions of the story. Be as straightforward as possible. Be open to all explanations of the fight.
4. Support the school's punishment. Even if your child is not at fault, the school usually punishes everyone involved. Do not speak badly of the school's punishment. Make the student comply with the punishment the school gives him.
5. Punish the child at home. The severity of the punishment should depend on the extremity of the fight. Punishing the child at home tells the child that what she does at school affects her home life.
6. Role-play and discuss alternatives to the fight. After the child has calmed down, replay the fight with him. Point out different ways to resolve the conflict. Give him other options besides fighting.

Tips & Warnings

• Do not automatically assume your child is either at fault or innocent.
• Physical punishment should not be given to the child when he has been in a fight.
• Parents should avoid fights with others or with each other. Children learn from what they see.
• Do not blame or bad-mouth the school or other students in front of the child.