How to Find Birth Parents
There are several resources on the web available to help you start a search to find your birth parent or parents. Although likely a difficult journey, finding your birth parents can allow you to learn about yourself, your medical history and help you understand why your birth parents made the choices they did.
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Instructions
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Information Gathering Stage
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1
Gather every bit of information you can from your family about your adoption.
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2
Write down every piece of information you learn, even if it seems insignificant.
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3
Expand your research to include extended family members, family friends, family physicians or lawyers-anyone who might know something about your adoption. Also research the adoption laws in the state you were adopted to see what restrictions or procedures there are for learning about your adoption.
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4
Read handbooks and books from your local library on how to find your birth parents or buy books on the subject.
Using Information You've Gathered
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5
Use the information you've gathered to obtain specific information from the courts in the place you were adopted regarding your birth parents.
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6
Try petitioning to have your court file opened if it is sealed if your adoption was a private one. If you were adopted through an agency, contact both the agency and the court that handled the adoption.
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7
Find out what kind of "non-identifying information" about your birth parents the state you were adopted will provide to adopted children and petition the court to receive this information.
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8
Research the name you've found or been given in a variety of resources, like city directories, marriage or divorce records, or through hospital records. Hopefully your birth parents are still alive, but obituary searches might be useful for finding deceased grandparents.
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9
Consider whether you want to hire someone to do the search for you. Be sure to hire someone with specific experience in adoption research and to check that person's references.
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Tips & Warnings
Keep everything you write down in an organized place, like a notebook or a file folder.
Gather information for as long as it takes before you start actively searching to keep the search organized. Move at your own pace with the process.
There are several resources on the web available to help you with these various searches, including genealogy sites like Family Tree Maker or records sites like RMI services.
Be careful how you approach family members, friends or family physicians and lawyers. If you have reason to suspect an individual might not want to share information with you about your birth parents, there is no obligation for you to reveal why you are asking questions. Think of ways to approach the subject, if necessary, without directly revealing what you are doing.
Remember that, other than the court that must know information about what you're doing, people who work at agencies, hospitals, or anywhere else you may research may be resistant to providing information regarding an adoption. As a result, determine beforehand how you will approach the situation. If you're unsure how the individual or organization will treat your request for information, do not mention that you are searching for a birth parent.
