How to Get Away with Doing Nothing At Work

Those people are out there that actually love their jobs. Those people don't have to come up with gimmicks to get by everyday, they simply go into work and stay busy and love every minute of it. For those of us who don't love our jobs, and would prefer to do nothing at work, we need a guide to keep up the guise of being busy.

Instructions

1. Keep your work space cluttered. The sign of a busy person is a desk full of papers and "work" to be done. If your desk is clean, your co-workers will assume you have nothing to do, and give you more.

2. Stare at your computer screen for long stretches of time. As long as you type something every once in awhile, people around you will assume that you are busy reading. They won't have a clue that you are actually accomplishing nothing.

3. Walk down the halls, and through the office, with important looking papers in your hands. Be sure to walk quickly, with your head up, facing straight ahead. This way people will think that you are hurrying to another meeting or you are on an important mission.

4. Print things often, and then spend time pouring over them. Even if they are only directions to the nearest Italian restaurant, none of your co-workers know that.

5. Keep moving busily, even if you don't have "work" to do to keep you busy. Moss never grows on a rolling stone. Co-workers will steer clear of you if you have the look of a stressed and frenzied worker.

Tips & Warnings

• Don't go overboard with the Internet on a work computer. Visiting too many non-work related sites can get you fired.

• Don't stop working all at once. If you ease into the life style of a non-worker, it will be less noticeable.

• Beware of spies. In every office there lies a spy/snitch. Those are the people you must never let you see doing nothing at work. You may have one in your office, or twenty. Take precautions to cover yourself should you ever be accused by one.