How to Get Alien Abduction Insurance

If you have ever wondered how your family would be taken care of in the event you were abducted by aliens, a Florida company has a solution. Purchase $10 million in UFO abduction insurance to ensure your loved ones on Earth aren’t forgotten while you are out touring the galaxy. The Saint Lawrence Agency owns the copyright to alien abduction insurance and has paid out on claims in the past. Read on to get alien abduction insurance.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Contact a UFO abduction insurance provider by visiting the Saint Lawrence Agency website.
2. Find out whether you meet the policy approval guidelines by taking the Texas IQ test provided on the website. Applicants cannot be turned down due to age or preexisting conditions.
3. Have a sense of humor. This is the first question on the test and is an absolute requirement for approval of your UFO abduction policy.
4. Complete the test by indicating whether you take the policy seriously. Also indicate whether your mother and father were related before marriage. If you answer yes to both of these questions, the company denies your policy. Answering yes to one or the other is acceptable.
5. Click on the secure order form.
6. Name a policyholder and choose a beneficiary.
7. Pay a single lifetime premium plus shipping and handling to receive your approved policy and claim instructions by mail.

Tips & Warnings

• Consider additional coverage against alien abduction as the policy pays $1 per year over 10,000,000 years.
• Choose a beneficiary who is likely to remain on the planet.
• Policies are sold as UFO abduction insurance and not alien abduction insurance because otherwise the insurer would have to pay out if a policy holder was kidnapped by illegal immigrants.