How to Find a Plus Size Prom Dress

Prom shouldn't be a time to worry--it should be a time to get drunk and deflowered! No, no. I kid! I swear! In fact, I was a straight and narrow virgin as a graduating senior--and, not to be preachy, but I think you should be, too. We all have the rest of our lives to have complicated sexual relationships, but high school can be blissfully, beautifully simple. Try it. Enough of the soapbox and on to more important things: DRESSES. Proms and weddings--these are the two times you should have carte blanche for beauty. Every gown, hairpiece, product and shoe should be at your disposal. And just because our pathetic society tells young girls that a size zero is the end-all be-all of gorgeousness, it doesn't mean they have to listen. And girls? I'm a zoftig, round-bottomed, heaving-bossomed size 8, and I have to bash the guys away with a bat. So celebrate your lovely lady lumps and do it with style. It's prom! It only happens once! Ok, twice....

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• computer
• internet skills
• style!

1. You already know you could wander around the mall, aimlessly checking the anchor stores' thousands of squished dresses for something bigger than a 6, but I think we both know the potential of finding something you adore, in addition to being the perfect size, is unlikely. So....
2. Online! Online shopping will be your best friend for this process. Hopefully you've given yourself enough time to order, receieve, try on, hate, and send back.
3. If your parents are awesome enough to be ok with this, buy a few dresses at a time on line (be sure to check the return policies!) so that you have all the options in front of you at the same time--this way you can compare and contrast immediately!
4. Check out www.jacron.com They have dresses categorized by size, type, even color! And there's something there for funky, black-loving girls and sweetie-pie princesses alike.
5. For my straight pouffy gal-pals, you can find some adorable dresses on www.greatformalz.com
6. And if you're all glam, all the time, I really like www.sydneyscloset.com They have chic and sophisticated gowns which are expertly tailored--but a bit pricier than the others.

Tips & Warnings

• The most important feature of almost any piece of clothing is the fit. If you find something you totally adore and its a little too big here, or a little too tight there, invest in a tailor--finding the perfect fit can also be a curvy girl's best friend!
• When doing your hair, please heed this advice: NO MORE TENDRILS! I know we all want to look chic and different on prom night, and tendrils are different all right. But not in a good way. I suggest looking on line and finding beautiful chignons worn by classic sirens like Sophia Loren or Grace Kelly. If you emmulate something classic, you WILL be different--in a good way. And, as an added bonus, when you look back on your prom pics with your kids one day, you won't cringe and shudder. How do I know? I recently whipped out my photo boxes and came upon my very own prom-hair and it was worse than tendril-town. It was a full blown curled-to-the-max mid nineties 'do. And it was a don't.