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Step 1
Watch for men with macho attitudes who see sex as a personal conquest. These men make disparaging, crude remarks about women and sex. A date rapist wants to appear strong and in charge--someone who gets what he wants, no matter what. He's trying to stroke his ego-and impress the other guys with his exploits. Athletes and frat boys who live in a climate of competition and macho one-upmanship account for 3 percent of all college men, yet they are named in 19 percent of all reported date rapes on campuses.
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Step 2
Date rapists tend to be hostile towards women. They often make disparaging or crude remarks about women and sexual exploits. They tend to laugh too loud, brag too much and talk too inappropriately. They also tend to be possessive, jealous and controlling-seeing women as things to own rather than persons to love.
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Step 3
Another red flag to watch for is a man who invades your personal space. They are trying to test the waters with you and see how strong your personal boundaries are.
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Step 4
Often with a date rapist, you'll see a very popular handsome guy with a shy, insecure girl who isn't popular or especially attractive. Predatory men pick these women because they're usually easier to push around psychologically. They are also less likely to assert themselves, to turn down attention from a guy, complain about being treated poorly or to report a rape.
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Step 5
Date rapists use all kinds of psychological weaponry. They may joke, plead, scare, embarrass or guilt women into doing more than they feel comfortable. They almost never use physical weapons. They prefer to believe that they are just that good. Date rape is a psychological game for the date rapist. It is much more about control and power than about sex.
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Step 6
Quick to buy drinks for a woman, date rapists use the alcohol they pay for as a weapon to loosen their date's inhibitions. They can be charming and free with their money just long enough to get someone drunk enough to lose their judgment.
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Step 7
Other weapons date rapists employ are date rape drugs which cause a lack of inhibition and invoke a semi-conscious state while having an amnesiac effect on the victim the next morning. These can't be detected after 24 hours--72 hours if combined with alcohol in the bloodstream. Date rape drugs are freely available street drugs now.
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Step 8
Some date rapists don't follow the usual pattern. Some are unattractive, unassertive men who are often overlooked or made fun of and will often will use date rape drugs to get what they feel they can't otherwise get (again-power/control more than the sex). Stay alert to anger directed at women from any man.
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Step 9
A little knowledge can go a long way. Heeding the red flags will help keep you safe!
Comments
guardtoday said
on 3/14/2008 GREAT artical right on target love step #8 all around an artical to print and hang up in college dorms.
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