How to consider bangs

Feeling blah-ish and lame? Maybe a little hagsville? Cut bangs. If Reese Witherspoon's didn't convince you last night at the Globes, then you're beyond help.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• a hairdresser

1. First, consider the bang-choices of:
   1. Amanda Peet in Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. She's always
   delightful even though the show is a self-indulgent, self-important
   love letter to Aaron Sorkin, FROM Aaron Sorkin. But her bangs rule.
   2. Cate Blanchett in Notes on a Scandal. See this movie even if you
   hate bangs and have no intention of making them a part of your life.
   3. Nelly Furtado. I realize some people think hers are too Cleopatra,
   and while I have a number of issues with Nelly, namely her oft-exposed
   doughy knees, I believe her blunt fringe is darling and youthful.
   4. Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's. Duh.
   5. My new favorite: La Witherspoon. Perfection.
2. Find a hairdresser. He should be a man. Men know how to cut bangs on a woman. I don't make the rules.
3. Bring said hairdresser many pictures of the bangs of your dreams. If he says "I get it. You can put the pictures away now", he's all over it. If he indulges you too much and asks you a lot of questions about texture and length, he's still a beginner, is clearly overindulgent and it's time to move on.

Tips & Warnings

• Warning: Extended mirror-gazing and egomania may occur. When this happens, clip your bangs off to the side to return back to the land of mere mortals.