How to prepare for a new baby

I found that when I was pregnant, many older mums would say unhelpful things like: "Oh, you'll have your hands full" and "life will never be the same again". It actually frightened me, because they would be negative but didn't give me any practical things I could do to make things easier when bringing home a new baby. I put this article together based on things I had to figure out along the way. This is my 'Gold list' of the most important things to know when having a new baby. I've also written a'Last Minute baby shopping list' - and 'Breastfeeding tips' My aim is that after you read my articles you'll be better prepared to have your new baby!

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. In hospital
   • Bring some disposable nappies and a few cute outfits for visiting hours (they use cloth nappies at hospital and I am frightened of the big pins! They provide outfits for the baby which is great cos no washing, but it’s nice to have dress them up too)
   • Pack toiletries in small bottles and keep them in your shower/bathroom in the hospital. Helped me feel a bit pampered.
   • Hospital visiting hours, turning my phone off, silent setting on mobile, landline off-hook, door signs saying ‘This mother and baby taking well deserved rest’. Nurses will filter your visitors for you and they will usually tell the people you have specified that you don’t want to see ‘Sorry, she is resting at the moment’
   • In hospital use the dimmer switch – keeping it fairly dark at night feeds. In morning I woke up, open curtains and talk to baby so she can start to distinguish night and day
   • Learn how to wrap a newborn beforehand
   • Take to the hospital comfy PJ bottoms and stretchy soft nighty cotton tops (without a bra).
   • Be prepared for moments of ‘weepiness’, especially when milk comes in, and telling myself ‘It will get easier’ and ‘I’m going to be kind to myself’ and ‘I’m just tired/hormonal’
   • Pain killers (I had to keep reminding the nurses for these)
2. And the uncomfortable bits…
   • Get the nurses in to help with each breastfeeding session – not thinking ‘I ought to know how to do this’ – they can help stop the baby hurting your breasts
   • Rub your belly (uterus) quite hard when breast-feeding – it helps it contract back into shape.
   • Lean forward on the toilet so it doesn’t get on any stitches. Ask for ‘Ural’ drink which helps neutralize wee and it won’t sting as much.
   • Pack maternity pads. Using these underneath the ones the hospital give you
3. At home –the first 12 weeks
   • Be kind to yourself with positive ‘Self-talk’. ‘I am doing a great job’ ‘I am a great mum and am learning all the time’ ‘I have a newborn baby and need to take it easy for at least 3 months’.
   • When people bring food or clean, say ‘Thankyou!’ and accept it. It makes things so much easier. Accept help from others rather than feeling as if you have to prove you’re capable by doing it all yourself.
   • If you have visitors and are tired, say ‘I’m really tired and need to have a nap’ and if they don’t leave, say ‘Ok, I’m going to have a nap now’ and just do it. It is not rude – they are being rude.
   • Try to keep a diary for scheduling visitors. That way you don’t need to remember things more than 1 day in advance. You can take ‘one day at a time’ but not feel trapped in ‘Groundhog day’
   • Don’t bother with using a baby bath because it’s a huge pain to fill it and it makes a mess. It’s much easier to just put the baby in the bath with you or husband! Good bonding time too.
   • Eat cake for breakfast. It’s easy and yummy and calories for breastfeeding!
   • Cook meals in bulk (like spaghetti) and freeze it.
   • Drink Milo and Berocca for extra nutrients (not mixed together!)
   • To save time, when u shower, shave and clean teeth at same time. Shower once per day even if you don’t feel like it (!). Look after yourself. It’s ok to let babies cry in their crib when you’re having a shower! You have to take care of yourself too!– so don’t feel guilty about this.
   • Use baby’s sleep time to rest, treat yourself to things that help you feel pampered (not housework).
   • Feed baby, then get husband to take baby away for a drive so you can get a proper sleep. Don’t do housework! Take the phone off the hook and put a sign on the door to divert people away.
   • Get some fresh air. Gentle exercise – walking, yoga. Don’t live in a twilight indoor world of sleeping, eating and feeding your baby.
   • If you feel unusually down for a long time, or if your mind is racing see your GP and tell them about how you are feeling (and that you may like some medication to help you). Only you know your own mind so be clear with the doctor and don’t let them fob you off!
4. Breast-feeding tips
   No-one expects to sit down to a piano without having had any lessons and play Beethoven's 16th Concerto in Dminor. Breastfeeding is the same thing - it is a learned skill. You don't know how to do it automatically. It is not a natural instinct (it isn't!) - just because you have breasts doesn't mean you do or should know how to use them right away.
   
   It takes practice, patience and being KIND to yourself. Here are some tips that I found made things easier for me.
   
   • Set up a tray of things you want handy when feeding (cos you can’t leap up and get it in the middle of a feed). This way you can keep stuff together and easily just carry the tray into the lounge, bedroom, back patio etc. Your tray might have: Painkillers (for the first week), BIG glass of water cos you get thirsty, damp face-washer to keep the baby awake during the feed, digital watch with backlight to keep track of feed times, lipgloss, breast sooth cream, phone, phone numbers of hospital and breastfeeding helpline, notebook and pen, multivitamins, anything else you want like fruit (punnet of strawberries)
   • Try to space feeds 2½ - 3½ hours apart. Any closer together and it gets too exhausting! Any farther apart and the baby will be up all night.. Read the book ‘Babywise’ it is good. But obviously tailor it to your own needs and beliefs and don’t take it word for word.
   • Sleep without a top or bra. Lie on top of a (soft) folded towel underneath your upper body.
   • Don’t breastfeed if you’re in an uncomfortable situation. If you’re uptight, embarrassed, tired, in pain the brain may not release oxytocin to squeeze the milk out. As the baby tries to drink, and the milk not coming down it will lead to cracked nipples! So relax first. Place warm cloth nappies (out of the dryer)on breasts first and think about your baby. Then put the baby on.
   • Check out Westfield shopping malls as they have in the parent’s rooms these little private cubicles with big comfy armchairs which are perfect for breastfeeding in.
   • If at a friend’s house/BBQ/party, ask to use a spare bedroom to breastfeed in. Don’t be afraid to tell people you want some privacy when you breastfeed! You don’t have to be some sort of women’s liberationist and you are allowed to feel embarrassed about pulling your breasts out in front of people you normally wouldn’t.
   • If you want to breastfeed in public with some privacy, use a soft baby wrap tied around your neck like a scarf, and drape it over yourself and
5. Last minute shopping list before baby is born
   (You’ll be able to get most of this from Big W and your Chemist)
   
    2 roll-on sunblocks
   (1 for nappy bag, 1 for home)
   
    About 5 Baby wraps
   
    1 x Newborn dummy
   (use only after breastfeeding is established). ‘Mam’ is the cutest brand.
   
    1 x good-sized baby bag
   (Summer has a My Little Pony one).
   
    A plastic change mat for the nappy bag
   (you can get good ones from Big W)
   
    3 x bulk boxes of Huggies Newborn nappies
   (Huggies are most absorbent and secure. Each box contains about 108, and have green packaging)
   
    1 large and 1 small Huggies Baby wipe plastic cases
   (1 for nursery, 1 for nappy bag)
   
    3 bulk refill packs of Huggies Baby wipes
   
    1 large pot of Baby bum cream
   (Sudocream brand, for nursery)
   
    1 tube of Baby bum cream for your nappy bag
   (Curash brand)
   
    1 Nappy bucket
   (even if doing disposables, it is good to soak dirty clothes in)
   
    Nappy san
   
    Pack of 10 baby face washers
   (these are in the Baby section at Big W)
   
    Pack of cloth nappies
   (for burping baby and lying on change table)
   
    1 pack of Paracetamol for adults
   
    2 bottles of Baby Paracetamol
   (one for home, one for nappy bag)
   
    2 bottles of Infacol
   (for colic – this is excellent) – one for home and one for nappy bag
   
    1 Small Baby powder
   (Don’t get talcum powder as it has been linked to cancer. Get ‘cornstarch powder’ by Johnson and Johnson)
   
    Bin with secure lid
   (for the nursery next the change table for dirty nappies)
   
    Scented garbage bags
   from Woolworths you can get scented ones (vanilla are nice, and they also have chocolate!)
   
    Orange Power Air Freshener
   (same brand as ‘Shower Power’) – this is excellent for spraying the room after a stinky nappy and has no bad chemicals
   
    Nipple cream
   (you can get free samples from the chemist)
   
    2 x LARGE maternity bras
   about 2 cup sizes bigger and 1-2 sizes up in the back than your normal bra (Big W are fine and cheaper)
   
    No-tears baby wash/shampoo
   
    5 packets of Maternity Pads
   (Homebrand is fine – whatever is cheapest)
   
    2 boxes Breast pads
   (Pigeon is the best brand – buy whatever is most expensive don’t skimp on these as you need them individually wrapped, the softest most absorbent type. Don’t use the washable ones as they are total crap - too rough and damp)
   
    From the Chemist: Hire an electric breastpump.
   You have to buy attachments for the electric one which will be about $100

Tips & Warnings

• Be KIND to yourself, and don't feel you have to rush around the country-side in the first 12 weeks after baby is born
• Sleep as much as you can
• Say 'yes' to all offers of cooking and cleaning help
• Say 'no' to any visitors that you don't have the energy to see.
• Speak to your doctor if you're depressed, can't sleep or if your mind is racing
• If you get flu-like symptoms, take 2 panadol, express your milk under a hot shower immediately, and go to the doctor and get antibiotics.