How to Make That First Phone Call

Okay, against all the odds, you've finally managed to score a phone number from that cute girl who hangs out at the corner Starbucks. (Or, alternately, the gal you've been corresponding with on that online dating site has given you the go-ahead to ring her up). How do you call her up for the first time without revealing yourself as a fumbling, bumbling troglodyte? Follow this step-by-step guide.

Instructions

1. Choose the right time. If your potential beloved has given you her home number, calling her during the day (when you know she'll be at work) and leaving a message on her answering machine is the wussiest maneuver imaginable. If she hasn't told you when to call, play it safe and aim for the early evening, when she's done with dinner and probably free to talk. (Needless to say, calling her at one in the morning is not a good idea).

2. Dial carefully. Nothing wrecks a budding romance faster than dialing the wrong number, being greeted with a skeptical "huh?" by a puzzled female voice, then not calling back because you think you've just been dissed big-time. Tamp down your ardor and dial the number very, very carefully. At least that way, if you get blown off, you'll know it's been by the right person.

3. Introduce yourself clearly. "Yo, it's me. Wassup?" is not a good way to kick off your first phone conversation with a person who barely knows you. It may seem oddly formal, but "Hi, Carol, this is John, the guy from the laundromat" won't leave a gal guessing about who's on the other end of the line. If she has no idea who "John from the laundromat" is, either you've dialed the wrong number (see Step #2) or she's had second thoughts about your romantic prospects.

4. If you leave a message, be brief. Picture this: your potential new friend has just walked back from the vet in a drenching thunderstorm, carrying her cranky, yowling cat. The last thing she needs to hear as she's standing in her bedroom dripping wet is an interminable, four-minute message from some guy to whom she apparently gave her phone number in a moment of insanity. A simple "Hi, Carol, it's John, the guy from the laundromat, I guess you're not home, give me a call back at..." is all that's needed.

5. Don't call more than twice. If a gal doesn't answer your first phone message, it may be because she's unusually busy, she's been away unexpectedly or her machine is on the fritz. (This is rare, but it does happen occasionally). It's okay to call and leave a second message, but that's all. If she still doesn't get back to you, that's her reply, loud and clear.