How to Communicate Better in Your Relationship

Good communication is often the key to a successful relationship. But both partners must be willing to work at it. Good communication is not something that is mastered overnight; it is a skill that needs to be maintained. Here are some guidelines.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Self-help book
• Health insurance that covers counseling
• Relationship counselor

1. Most problems in a relationship are caused when one partner does not want to hear or understand what the other says. Sit down with your partner and talk about the communication problem you feel you're having.

2. Communication problems can occur with both the receiver and the sender. Try this exercise: Each partner should say something to the other. Then each of you should write down a few sentences describing your feelings about the other's statement. Compare what each of you wrote and discuss.

3. Read a reputable self-help book on communication within relationships. Browse bookstores or online, or ask friends for recommendations.

4. Seek professional help. This is often the best strategy when encountering relationship problems beyond your expertise. Counselors offer non-biased opinions, and can help resolve issues quickly.
   

5. Consult your health insurance policy to determine if counseling is covered. Usually a counselor has to be certified for insurance purposes.

Tips & Warnings

• Make sure your partner is willing to commit as much as you are. Don’t try to change a relationship problem by yourself.
• Try every suggestion you get. You never know whether something will work or not until you try it.
• Don’t expect immediate results. Communication problems cannot be fixed overnight. In order to change them you must invest time and be fully committed.
• Counselors can be found through recommendations from family, friends, doctors, religious leaders or therapists.
• Contact a counselor if a good amount of time goes by and nothing changes. The situation may be beyond your control.